How to make a challenging relationship EASIER

Relationships are simple and complicated at the same time.

Simple because a relationship is... our thoughts about the other person.  

Complicated because of the words and actions of others and what we make that mean.

To simplify it more if you want a better relationship with your: spouse, teen, son, daughter, mom, dad, mother or father in law all you have to do is think better about them.  

A few tips to thinking better about them is:

  1. It has to be believable to you.
  2. Baby step it.  It's hard to jump from he's such a brat to he's delightful.  How about He's a human just like me.
  3. It takes practice to believe something new.

Here are a few examples of shifts you can try to make.

❌Think they are so difficult.
✅Think they are doing the best they can.

❌Think he/she is such a brat.
✅Think he/she is a human just like me.

❌Think my mom should text instead of call...
✅Think she should do whatever she wants.

❌Think my child is so whiny.
✅Think it's so nice she feels comfortable with me.

❌Think they shouldn't buy that.
✅Think it's their $ they can do what they want with it.  

These examples are very broad, but you get the idea.  

Is it time to get help with your relationship?  Don't worry it doesn't have to be an uncomfortable process.  People find it very empowering.  My process is simple and it assumes the best of everyone involved.  It helps you find solutions to areas where you feel stuck.  

If you are ready to chat and want to feel more: peace, calm and ease in your relationship click HERE for a relationship consultation. 

Take care,
Megan

I'd love to hear from you.  Send me a DM on IG to say hello.  

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A child's behavior is not a sign of who they are.

Recently we were at my son's soccer game, 15-16 yr old boys.  I do and don't like watching the older kids play because they get so physical.   At one point in the game there was an argument then a player on the opposing team picked up one of our players and threw him to the ground and started wrestling him.  It was crazy!  The ref gave that player a red card, and he was out.   A short time later that player and his dad went to their car which was parked right behind where we were sitting.  I didn't hear anything that was said, but it seemed that there was a lecture going on.   After the game I said to my husband, "that boy didn't want to do that, that's not who he is.  I'm sure he felt so angry that's how he reacted.  He might already feel bad enough that he doesn't need a lecture.  When we do stuff like that and don't have compassion for ourselves we hate ourselves and feel shame."  I felt bad for that boy, and thankfully no one was seriou
Read more

How to have less sibling fights in your home

Do you kids fight? I think they all do to some extent.   The more I learn, study, test and apply I learn what does and doesn't work.  Here are a few things you can do that will help to have less sibling fights and contention in your home. 1.  Think good about your child.  This is possible, but not always easy to do.  I like to make it a practice.  Here is what I like to do.  Most days at the end of the day I like to write down something I noticed about my kids.  Something kind, cute, funny, they did or said.  I also have a picture of them on the mirror in my bathroom as I get ready I like to look at those pictures and think how cute, kind, sweet, fun, and funny they are.  I like to ask myself, why am I thankful for _______? 2.  Compassion  Compassion is understanding.  Why are they fighting?  Usually one or both kids are feeling: mad, sad, frustrated, annoyed, irritated, bugged, upset, etc.  When we can PAUSE and remember they are good and are feeling ______ that allows us to enter
Read more

3 steps for less fighting and yelling at home

I believe it's our job as parents to teach our kids about their emotions.  I think society is getting better with it being more talked about. Here are three steps you can use to start talking more about feelings in your home and as a result have less yelling, fighting, and arguing. This can be so simple when kids are young you can use phrases like, "I notice you seem mad." "I hear loud voices in here." "You have some big feelings." "It's ok to cry." "You seem concerned." Just acknowledging the feeling is the   first step .  That's easy to do with our kids.   The   2nd step   is to ask your child if they were/are feeling more   worried or concerned embarrassed or shy. When we give them options we help them to put a name to what they are feeling.  Often they don't know what they are feeling so we offer suggestions and let them decide. Step 3   get some sort of feelings chart you can hang somewhere. I'm always surprised
Read more