How could this change your family?

 Parent from a place where your kids don't have to lie or be sneaky!

I woke up recently around 4:00 am with this phrase in my head.  I quickly wrote it down then went back to sleep.

I have been thinking about it lately.  

As humans we lie or are sneaky because we don't want to get in trouble, OR we don't want to disappoint someone.  So why would our kids lie or sneak?

Again, not get in trouble and because they want to do something they think we'd say no to.

How would parenting more honestly change your family?

Instead of telling your kids no you can't watch Youtube.  Be honest.  What's the real reason?

Maybe you're scared they'll watch something inappropriate or they will watch too long?  I'm not saying being honest will make them understand and be like, "ok thanks mom I get it now." 

Having honest conversations will strengthen your relationship.

They are still going to whine and complain.  That's their job as kids is to push back.  Can you let them whine and complain with understanding and compassion?

I don't have the answer to this, but I want you to think and ponder it.

If you are controlling the treats or the video games and "lock them up" so to speak you are kind of creating the sneakiness.  If you blame them for something it's natural to get defensive and lie.

I'm not saying you leave it all out and they get to do whatever they want.  I'm offering to be honest and HAVE CONVERSATIONS!

Let them be part of what's decided.  If they want to play video games you could get their opinion, "I think 30 min, is long enough what do you think?  They'll say something like 2 hours😂.  Come to a conclusion together.  Maybe 45-60 min. then ask them, "do you want to monitor the time or do you want me to?"  I've had my kids do both.

Not only will they be more compliant you are teaching your kids how to have conversations and how to be honest.  

I don't remember the details but not too long ago I do remember my 16 YO saying, "how can I nicely tell you and dad to stop talking to me about this?"  He was being honest.  He didn't get in trouble to this request either.  He's learning how to communicate maturely and respectfully.  

My tip for this week is to BE MORE HONEST you might be surprised at how smoothly things go.

It's ok to say, "I know this sounds weird or silly."  "This is kind of uncomfortable but..."

Adios,
Megan


There are two ways to get more help.

1- Parenting C'crets group class and coaching. 
    I will teach better communication skills.  How to connect with your child for more connection.  How        to feel more confidence and I will teach you how to coach yourself so you can then help your kids.  
    Four weeks, over zoom.  $87. To register CLICK HERE.

2- Embracing Calm 1:1 coaching.  Get more details by CLICKING HERE.
    Six weeks, over Zoom, $300

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