Parenting is about the parent

The more I study parenting, emotions, brain development, human development etc.  I've concluded that parenting is about the parent.  

Parenting is about: 

  • learning to respond and not react.
  • learning to control our emotions.
  • learning to let go of control.
  • LOVING UNCONDITIONALLY.
  • learning to take care of yourself emotionally so you're not so phased when something happens or your child does something you don't like (and they will).
  • learning to have uncomfortable conversations.
  • learning to LOVE yourself when we mess up (we will, often).
  • learning to apologize again, and again, and again.
  • being kind even when you don't feel like it.
  • learning to deal with hard things and knowing you will be ok.
  • teaching through the way you live your life, not the words you say.
  • learning new skills.
  • connecting with your child with things they like.
  • being patient with your child and yourself.
  • learning the rules of the road again (teaching kids to drive).
  • not being so serious.
  • learning to laugh more.
  • AND so much more.

These are just a few that came to my mind.  There is not one right way to parent, but the better you can take care of yourself: physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally the better parent you will be.  
  • This is what I teach.


“The sign of great parenting is not the child’s behavior. The sign of truly great parenting is the parent’s behavior.” – Andy Smithson


Round two of Parenting C'crets - never fight with your kids again is starting Feb. 7.  Online, for four weeks, each week is geared towards: connection with your child, communication (learning to communicate differently), confidence (in yourself and in your kids), and coaching (yourself and then coaching your kids).  It's $87.  Replays will be available.  Register by clicking here.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A child's behavior is not a sign of who they are.

Recently we were at my son's soccer game, 15-16 yr old boys.  I do and don't like watching the older kids play because they get so physical.   At one point in the game there was an argument then a player on the opposing team picked up one of our players and threw him to the ground and started wrestling him.  It was crazy!  The ref gave that player a red card, and he was out.   A short time later that player and his dad went to their car which was parked right behind where we were sitting.  I didn't hear anything that was said, but it seemed that there was a lecture going on.   After the game I said to my husband, "that boy didn't want to do that, that's not who he is.  I'm sure he felt so angry that's how he reacted.  He might already feel bad enough that he doesn't need a lecture.  When we do stuff like that and don't have compassion for ourselves we hate ourselves and feel shame."  I felt bad for that boy, and thank...
Read more

3 steps for less fighting and yelling at home

I believe it's our job as parents to teach our kids about their emotions.  I think society is getting better with it being more talked about. Here are three steps you can use to start talking more about feelings in your home and as a result have less yelling, fighting, and arguing. This can be so simple when kids are young you can use phrases like, "I notice you seem mad." "I hear loud voices in here." "You have some big feelings." "It's ok to cry." "You seem concerned." Just acknowledging the feeling is the   first step .  That's easy to do with our kids.   The   2nd step   is to ask your child if they were/are feeling more   worried or concerned embarrassed or shy. When we give them options we help them to put a name to what they are feeling.  Often they don't know what they are feeling so we offer suggestions and let them decide. Step 3   get some sort of feelings chart you can hang somewhere. I'm always surprised...
Read more

Use MGI for better relationships!

If you want to feel better and fight less with your teen use  MGI (most generous interpretation) .  I learned this phrase from Dr. Becky Kennedy.   When my son was ornery the other night and a little snippy with everyone.  I thought he's probably tired.  I mentioned it to him and he said yes.  I said, "I know you're tired, you'll feel better in the morning." When my son was getting ready for school and came out and said loudly, "you won't help me."  I noticed he was frustrated and asked why?  He was trying to unstick a bandaid that had stuck together.  I said, "I'll just get you a new one, let's get ready for school." When my son said, "we always have the worst dinners."  I thought he doesn't like this one meal and he's hungry.  I said, "I bet you're hungry if you don't want this you can make yourself some toast." I believe that most people are doing the best they can, that most people have good i...
Read more