Megan Whitesides Coaching

The way we think about our kids is how we experience them.  If I think my son is such a brat, I'm going to see ALL the times he is a brat.  If I think you're always irritating everyone, I'm going to see ALL the little irritating things my son does.  This is a negative cycle and will continue UNTIL I make a change.  YES, it would be great if my kids changed, but that's not likely.  AWARENESS is the first step.  STOP AND DO THIS Take 10 min. and write down this question: What am I currently thinking about (child's name here)? IT is KEY that you don't edit this.  Let all your thoughts come out (you don't have to show anyone).  This will give you the awareness.   NOW, the next question is:  Do I want to change anything about this relationship? If it's a no, then that's just good to know, own it. If it's a yes, then we have to start challenging some of the things you wrote down. Keep your same paper and notice if you use the words always...

Before I had kids I'd hear stories of it just being terrible.  Parents yelling at their kids, accidents, and kids refusing to go.  It made total sense to me why a kid would not go to the bathroom when they were being yelled at and it was a negative experience. I remember vowing to not do it that way.  Through my won experience and research here are a few tips I want to offer to you to help. #1️⃣ WAIT     So often parents push potty training because they want it.  I promise if you will wait until the child is ready it'll go SO much faster and smoother.  Sure, introduce it and make it exciting, but if you do and your child doesn't respond well then WAIT.       I know this can be hard.  I know there's a feeling of urgency and desperation that your child will be in diapers FOREVER (I promise they won't).  This is where coaching coming in to help you with those feelings, stay calm, and be more patient. #2️⃣ LET GO OF CONTROL ...

As a parenting coach I talk to many parents that feel frustrated with their kids, especially those teens.  Sheesh, they can be tricky, but I have found having these three phrases in your back pocket make parenting a little🤏🏼 bit easier.  Here they are what the benefits are. "Try again."   I use this ALL THE TIME.  When my son says, "bruh, can you come get me?"  I say, "try again."  I've used this his whole life so he knows what I mean, "can you please come get me?"   I'll say it when I feel like their tone is mean, angry, or when they are demanding or impatient. I love try again because it assumes good in our child.  It allows me to feel calm and not get mad and think my kids are talking back.  My kids also use it with me😂, which I am thankful for.  I am human too, and sometimes don't speak very kindly.   "I notice(d)..." Humans want to be seen, heard, and noticed.  When we notice our kids we are giving them the me...

I was having a conversation with one of my teens recently and he was telling me some of the worries he has about the future and some things he wants in his future.  He was getting overwhelmed thinking about how it'll all work and how to have enough $.   As I talked to him I was filled with compassion and love for him.  So OFTEN we see our kids, especially teens, outward behaviors as rude, negative, selfish, etc.  Underneath most of their behaviors is some sort of fear.  I believe it's our job as parents to look past the "bad" behavior and try to see them for who they are. If we can find the small opportunities to have deeper conversations we WILL LEARN SO MUCH about them and who they are.  It'll be easier to see past their behaviors.   It takes a willingness to listen and not just offer suggestions, help or try to fix.  The more I listened the more he talked (which is rare), and then the more he listened to me.  I told him he's doing so ...