Teens🙄 (A conversation with my teen)

I was having a conversation with one of my teens recently and he was telling me some of the worries he has about the future and some things he wants in his future.  He was getting overwhelmed thinking about how it'll all work and how to have enough $.  

As I talked to him I was filled with compassion and love for him.  So OFTEN we see our kids, especially teens, outward behaviors as rude, negative, selfish, etc.  Underneath most of their behaviors is some sort of fear.  I believe it's our job as parents to look past the "bad" behavior and try to see them for who they are.
If we can find the small opportunities to have deeper conversations we WILL LEARN SO MUCH about them and who they are.  It'll be easier to see past their behaviors.  

It takes a willingness to listen and not just offer suggestions, help or try to fix.  The more I listened the more he talked (which is rare), and then the more he listened to me.  I told him he's doing so well.  He's such a good kid, it'll all work out.  
Then I threw in a little coaching😜.  I said, "when I start feeling overwhelmed I think of zooming in.  Just like a camera lens zooms out and in right now you are way zoomed out trying to figure it all out.  Zoom in to right now: work, go to school, save $, enjoy life now.  Zooming in feels more doable and not so scary."

Take advantage of the little times you have with your teen like for us as we drove to Culver's. Don't force the conversations.  You won't regret it and they will appreciate it some day.  Let conversation come naturally, it can be helpful to ask good questions to help them think deeper. Turn off the distractions: music, phones, TV, and CONNECT.  I believe it's these little moments that are such great opportunities to connect, strengthen, and create great relationships.


Take care,
Megan

If you want more of these conversations and a great relationship, but don't know how, it feels hard, or don't know where to start I want to invite you to try coaching.  Investing in you and your relationship with your kids is WORTH EVERY PENNY.

Check out my new page for more info. on 1:1 coaching. 

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